The greatest lesson I learnt from competing.

The greatest lesson I learnt from competing.

I am a highly competitive person and I compete like no one else’s business. 

For years I have competed against the ones I thought were the best.

Some contests I won.

Some I lost.

In the month of September 2010, I got involved in what I could consider as one of the most anticipated and hyped up contests ever in the history of my speakers club.

The background story was this

I lost a qualifying contest at the lower levels which I was supposed to win.

It hurt my ego.

And to make it worse, I lost to someone I very recently had a ‘tiny’ issue with.

So because my ego was hurt, in turn it escalated into a kind of a revenge ‘grudge’ match.

I decided to go all out and prove my sense of worth.

And boy, did I take it to the extreme.

I practiced hard.

Worked late nights.

Slept only 4 hours everyday for the next 3 weeks.

Did nothing but eat, sleep, drink, live and breathe this competition.

It was absolutely crazy.

And yes, everything that one should not do, was done. 

Everything from emails with bad intentions to psyching each others head off.

But to make the long story short, after the contest was over – the person whom I was hoping to have my ‘grudge match’ – never actually made it past the qualifying round of the days contest.

And with regards to myself, well, I found myself at one end of a very long stick where I had not just one opponent but many. Not just one judge whom I didn’t like but many.

Not just one person whom I didn’t in the audience but many.

And after losing out in the semi-finals, though considered as the top team to compete in the finals, I was crushed.

As I looked at my so called ‘nemesis’, I saw his crestfallen face.

Did I get any satisfaction out of all my drama?

No.

So many thoughts, feelings, emotions and memories flooded my head for the next many hours and I asked myself – was all this worth it?

Was it really worth it?

He was a person who gave his best and lost with honor. 

What satisfaction did I get by trying to hurt him?

Sadly, none what so ever. 

For years I have banged my head against a thick wall hoping to crack this wall.

When I have succeeded breaking one, another one appeared.

Once that was done, yet another one appeared.

Where and when would it end?

I mean the list of judges whom I would like would never stop.

The competitors I would face, would never end.

The unfair moments in life would just never go away.

So what was the point of battling it out with the system?

Could I ever succeed?

That is where after contemplating for hours and hours, asking myself the question so many times, I finally got my answer.

To stop competing.

To stop competing with others.

And start competing ONLY with myself.

I know one thing, I can never beat everyone all the time.

There will be days that I would be better.

There would be days I would not be.

But what I can focus on, is being better than who I was.

If everyday I can improve one step at a time, well I think I am making progress.

So in the end of it all, I realized the most important principle of competition.

Never ever ever compete against anyone.

Instead learn to only compete against yourself.

That to me was the greatest lesson I learnt from competing.