(I read this amazing article written by my buddy Jason D’Almeida. At first when I thought of reading it, I was sure I would have something to comment or put a rude critical remark with regards to his note. But I was mesmerized with his thoughts. Read it and see why.
The Shade in the Mirror
by Jason Dalmeida on Wednesday, September 8, 2010 at 1:55pm
Preface:I am coming back to this blog space after ages. My apologies for it.
Most often there are so many topics that haunt me throughout the day, some of them funny and most of them completely outrageous, but all of them except this one could not remain the while till i reached a computer. So bear with me people here comes one more...
The Shade in the Mirror.
Off lately, against all unessential traditions I did want to grow a fancy slim beard... I did what I had to, let the beard grow against all odds, which actually only motivated me to reach my goal...
Then came the day when the unwanted hairline had to be shaved off till the edges of their follicles, leaving behind a defined shape that I always wanted to remain on my face....
The barber was calm and yes it happened just the way I wanted...
When I reached home, I ran to the bathroom, found my favorite mirror on the wall and looked at myself...
I suddenly realised two things...
- For some reason, I think my humility had flushed down the throne behind me and I was praising this person in the mirror
- and I wondered, who is this person in the mirror...
Like a curious kid, I reached out and tried to touch the person in the mirror...
He was cold. My hands ran over the hands in the mirror, but there was no texture, he was flat and so meaning less. No matter how hard I pushed my fingers into the mirror, there seem to be a clear divide between the two, which seemed physically impossible to meet.
He smiled at me every time I smiled at him... I know I had a reason to smile, and the reason was to make him smile, but why did he smile. I couldnt say.
In spite of all this, why was I praising him, just because he looked like what I am or looked like what I am thought to be.
Then began the thought process... Pausing, stepping out of the moment, and assuming a holistic view of myself(s). I noticed that there are 2 people separated by a plane of perspective... and I asked myself which one of these two people are the real me... the way it seems, I couldnt tell the difference... it could be that real me is on one side initiating an action to see a reaction... or was it the real me on the opposite side waiting to react to any action by someone that I felt was the real me. The plane that separates the two, is a perspective that has been formed over the years, by people around me and personal experiences realised over the years.
The one side of me wants to break into the plane, but will I be able to break through all the layers that have been formed over the years. And what if I succeed to penetrate through this virtual plane with persistence and unprecedented amount of efforts, I find that there was actually nothing and I destroyed the only means of seeing what is actually perceived of me and find myself lost within myself, blinded and clueless of what I am.
On the other hand, if I assume I will never be able to break the plane of perception, I find myself at a crossroad, where i am unable to decide which side of the plane is the person I am supposed to be...
On one side there is a person who can walk away from the mirror, and the person in the mirror will disappear with him. He wont have to experience the pain and tribulations to seek the reality behind the plane of perspective
He will loose himself within himself with no reference to anything to show what he is for the real world, untill he finds another plane of perspective which will define his image into something different.
Or he could continue to be a reflection of what he feels is the real person, where his image remains to make an impression in the world, but the world and he, will continue to see only what they or he want to see of himself, but in the bargain he will become an entity that is cold, flat and emotionally unreachable...
I can only wish that these thoughts will someday find a conclusion... until such time... cheers!!!
(If you would like to contact Jason D’Almedia – Face Book – Jason Dalmeida or contact - jason.dalmeida@gmail.com or +971503175571)
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